Baseball Birthday Bonanza

Yesterday was Judah's 3rd Birthday party, which happened to be a very summery day. Our house and yard were full of family, friends and food. I asked Judah several weeks ago what kind of party he would like to have and he declared that he wanted a baseball birthday. I was delighted to find some very creative ideas on different blogs about what kind of food to serve and what decorations to make. It was a lot of fun (and a lot of work, phew!) to put it all together.
My favorite part were the banners I made. I wish I had gotten better pictures of them, but here they are Judah's pennant banners.

My least favorite part were the cake pops. I have made cake pops before and they were fabulous. I had no trouble with them the first time whatsoever. This time was completely different. I had trouble with them from start to finish. No matter, they tasted delicious - red velvet cake and cream cheese frosting. Note to any cake pop attempters: Use caution when making during warm weather and keep them in the fridge/freezer up until the very last second.

We served ball park food. Basically things you could order at an M's game like hot dogs, garlic fries, lemonade, peanuts, licorice and kettle corn. I only got messy pictures after everyone had dug in.

The kids enjoyed lots of bubbles, a sand pit and the slide. All in all, Judah was very happy with his birthday and is thoroughly enjoying his plethora of new toys. We were blessed to be able to share the day with many family members and friends.

Good News?

I had my appointment with the Bone & Joint Surgery Center at UW yesterday. I saw a Physician's Assistant because the doctor I was referred to wasn't going to be available for a few more weeks. The PA was kind, knowledgeable and calming. She took a look at my X-rays and MRI pictures. Her first comment was that the tumor looks calcified around the edges, which means that it has likely been there for a while. She seemed to think as far back as high school. She went on to say that it doesn't look very aggressive. It isn't growing and changing rapidly. She is, however, concerned that it is causing me pain. Pain is usually a sign that it is active. The only way to determine how active the tumor is, is with a bone scan. By determining it's activity level, they can further determine what the next steps should be.
The reason she didn't want to just take a biopsy, is because they would have to drill through the strong part of my bone. This would be major surgery with a recovery of at least a few weeks. It would also weaken my bone and make me more prone to injuries. Needless to say, the biopsy will only be done if absolutely necessary.
My bone scan will be done on August 22nd, which is the first day that my doctor can see me. He will go over the results right afterwards with me and then come up with a plan.
I definitely feel some relief, but I know that I don't have the answers that I need yet.
Thank you to everyone who has prayed for me and is continuing to pray.

Happenings

I want to write about my great disappointment that I was unable to participate in the Rock N Roll Half Marathon last month. I signed up for it in March and was determined to give it my all. I started running as often as my body would let me. For the first few weeks I was fine. Then I began to develop shin splints. They were incredibly painful, but I was determined to push through and not let the pain keep me from competing. After a few more very painful weeks, I decided I needed to rest a bit and then pick right back up where I left off. This continued over the next few months. Running, pain, rest, repeat. Running, pain, rest, repeat. I chalked it all up to a bad case of shin splints and a crappy pair of overpriced insoles.

Finally, with just a few weeks to go before the big race, I decided to see the doctor to rule out any damage I might have done by running with shin splints. I thought that perhaps I had developed a stress fracture. My doctor took X-rays and assured me that I did not have a stress fracture. I wasn't sure what to do, but still wanted to run the race as long as I wasn't in pain the day before. Then I got a call back from my doctor telling me that it seemed odd that I was still having such pain from plain old shin splints. She was also put off by the fact that the pain seemed to only be in my left shin since most times, it occurs in both shins.
I scheduled an appointment with the orthopedist that she referred me to. I almost didn't go to my appointment because I thought it was nothing. All this could possibly be was a case of bad luck and crappy shin bones, right? Wrong. The doctor took one look at my X-ray and noticed an "abnormality". Great. Nothing like the word "abnormal" to give you a good scare. "Worst case scenario, you have a cancerous bone tumor," he told me. I laughed because it seemed absurd. It was probably nothing, but he wanted to do an MRI to be certain that it was just a bad case of shin splints. I had the MRI the next day and waited an entire week to sit down with him and the results. I had pushed all negative thoughts out of my mind at that point and knew that this appointment would be quick. I would be on my way with the advice to ice and rest my leg.
Wrong again. The doctor walked into the room and pretended to flip through my MRI images. He already knew what he had to tell me. "It doesn't look good," he said. "It's a bone tumor." I was stunned; completely floored. I didn't even know what to say. "I'm sending you to the best doctor in Seattle....he specializes in bone tumors....you'll need to have a biopsy." I could not believe what I was hearing. I couldn't even think of anything to say or ask.
These past few days have been difficult. The first one was the hardest. I played every possible worst case scenario in my mind over and over. Cancer. Chemo. Radiation. My husband. My kids. What will they do without me? What if I lose my leg? I was a mess all day. I googled the name of the doctor I was to see and the first result that came up was: Seattle Cancer Care Alliance. Great. "I have Cancer," was all I could think all day.
Although that fear is still very present in my mind, I have floated back down to earth a bit and am feeling much more positive and hopeful. I wouldn't say that I've delved into the Bible much this past year. Not sure why, but I have been distant. So needless to say, that was where I knew I needed to go - to God's word which is the only place that can offer any kind of true peace. A friend of mine sent me a bunch of scripture verses that hit me right where I needed it. I have to say that no matter what happens I know that I am not alone. I can find comfort and strength in the midst of chaos, fear and uncertainty from the one true source of peace - Jesus.
For now, I wait. I would highly covet your prayers that God would heal me and that this bone tumor would be gone when the doctor goes to look for it on July 13th.

Neglect

I have severely neglected my photo blog and feel that I have altogether given up on my 365 day journey. It was a lot harder than I thought it would be to take a photo of something new and interesting every single day. I know this probably means that I am just lacking in creativity. I am disappointed with myself that I let so much time get away from me without purposefully taking a new picture every day. Maybe one day soon I'll feel inspired and decide to start up again. For now, the year long photo journal was a bust for me.

In other news, I feel that motherhood and parenting has becoming increasingly difficult these last few months. Now that Audrey is walking and has been for a while, it seems that my job description has become more of a referee than a mom. Judah and Audrey seem to constantly fight with each other. Yes, they do have their sweet moments when they get along and giggle about the same thing. That lasts for about 30 seconds and then the bickering continues. It's exhausting to say the least. I look forward to the day when they finally enjoy each other's company and can share with one another without being prompted by me.

And finally, I do have a few photos to share from my weekend away to Mt Baker with Andrew. We stayed in a little cabin in a very small town called Glacier. There was no cell service which these days is just plain weird. We drove out to Nooksack Falls and hiked around a bit. The falls were gorgeous and the greenery in the surrounding forest was stunning. The woods were so damp. I don't think they ever dry out, even on the warmest of summer days. After hiking around the falls, we drove all the way up Highway 542, which takes you straight to the summit of Mt. Baker. There was still plenty of snow on the mountain, and it even began to snow when we reached the top. We caught a quick view of Mt. Baker's peak, and learned that just adjacent to Mt Baker sits Mt Shuksan. A nice little geography lesson. Unfortunately, it was quite cloudy, so our visibility was low.

4/7

Thursday my sisters Erica and Tami came over for dinner and hang out time. Judah and Elijah had a great time together. Fueled by these cookies that they "made" together, they stayed up until 10 pm acting the way that crazy two year old boys do.

4/6

4/5

The great newspaper shred of 2011. I let the kids have at it with some ads I got in the mail. They were laughing hysterically and covering each other in newspaper. I'm angry that my camera was not cooperating, or rather that I was too stupid to notice that the lens wasn't focused properly. Oh well. You get the idea.